Unstuck Living logo

Archive for Possibilities


A new way of eating. Buying a new jacket. A new business. A decision to cut back: on what money goes out, time on Facebook, less time with energy vampires, less attention to naysayers. On to: A decision to be more positive. A new direction for the business. And I start by saying to myself, “Okay. Today’s the day the balloon goes up.” And off I go. Or is it really that simple?

For me, I first need to gear up. Get unstuck. Align my energy. Check out my negative self talk and quiet it to a dull roar. You know that chit chat, the words that whisper, “Will this be successful?” “Can I do this?” “What if it fails?” “Learning Zoom is hard. Maybe . . .” I figure those thoughts may be there somewhere, but they don’t need to be front and center. So I set aside a specific amount of time. And start.

Ah, the start. Resistance creeps in. I’m hungry. (That one always pops up.) Maybe an apple. I should make some tea. Sort my sock drawer. Text a friend. A muffin would be better. The temptation I can create can be overwhelming. Amazing I accomplish anything at all. And that way of being feels stuck. My mind idles in one place.

Then I remember Brene Brown saying, “Vulnerability is the birthplace of innovation, creativity and change.” I can choose to be open, for the first start will always feel wrong. No matter what I do. Or how much I prepare. Or how hard I push. It will always need to be reshaped. Refined in some way. And I have learned that’s a part of creating.

But how to move past resistance? Here are some ideas to get going:

  • Take stock of what’s going on. Is there something you’re doing that’s keeping you stuck? Perhaps the situation is not in your control. Or maybe you need patience to let it work itself out. Step back and take in the big picture. Then move on it.
  • Check self talk. Is what you’re saying to yourself nothing but negative? Did someone tell you, “You can’t do this. It’ll never be good enough.” Thank those thoughts for sharing and send them on their way.
  • Accept that you’ll have bad beginnings . . . and move on. So you gave it your all for a new position. But were rejected. It doesn’t mean you’re a loser. It means that job wasn’t a good fit. Back to the drawing board and continue the search for the right position. You’re the CEO of your life. Adjust your sails and cruise toward your destination.
  • What’s the smallest step you can take to get where you want to be? Do that today. Congratulate yourself on that mini success. Then immediately figure out what the next step will be. I did that when I began walking. I was so out of shape it took me an hour (that’s right, 60 minutes) to walk up and down a nearby hill. Rather than being discouraged, that time was my benchmark. Anything under that was gold. The next day? 59 minutes. And on it went.

What if . . . ? Ask yourself, “What if I could do this? How would I feel?” Then move on to the next step, “What do I need to do to feel that way?” Then do that. If you’re stuck, you are in a bad trance. Use self hypnosis to shift that perception and move to a new point of view. And yes, it’s that simple.

Dead Ends

Duff here. Dead ends are discouraging. I was walking along in My Winter Wonderland, minding My Own Business. Playing with My Shadow. Running Circles around Mom. (Such fun To Do.) But then, It was Time to head back Inside. My Paws were cold. I could Warm up and be Ready for the Next Adventure. That’s living unstuck.

But first, there was a Big Road Block. I hit a Dead End. Seems that Someone had backed up Their truck, and what I thought was a Path was the Rut they Left behind. Drat! I stood there for a Moment, figuring out What My Next Move would be. Would I jump Across? Would I turn around? Would I wait for Mom to Pick Me up? (She does that Sometimes.) The Decision Drama ramped up. I quickly Backed Out and went on My Merry way. Living unstuck.

What about You? What do You do when You come to a Dead end? How do You figure out Your Choices? And How do You know which One is right For You? I say: It’s a Gut Feeling. Evaluate Your options. Then feel what’s Right. You’ll never go Wrong. I guarantee. For I don’t. Live unstuck. #unstuck-living#bypss-dead-ends

Dead-end roads don’t mean you’ve come to your end; just means you need to take a different detour.

—Anthony Liccione


Duff photoDuff here. I was pondering the Concept of Creating the other day. You know, actually Developing Ideas. And then putting Feet to my Dreams. I imagine all Sorts of Things. I could be a Doberman in Disguise. Or That I have Powerful Confidence when meeting Other Dogs. Or even being able to Eat all the Food I want and enjoy every Mouthful. All of these Ideas are very Well and Good. But until I physically move in their Direction, that’s all they’ll be: the fantasies of a Puppy.

But as You know, I live unstuck. I go All Out. There are Occasions when I meet another Dog and I bark Furiously. I am under the Impression I’m a Very Large Dog. But that Delusion is dashed when Mom scoops me up and Keeps me out of Harm’s Way. (I know she’s really protecting the other Canine, but really!) And then there are Times when I want to eat more than I can Handle. Now that’s a problem I don’t even want to Discuss in Polite Company. And that’s You, my Fan and Gentle Reader.

Mom does well to Write for Me, for my Paws are too large for the keyboard. She has ways of Knowing what I want to say (She and I Communicate quite Easily). I am proud of how She expresses my Concept of the World, for I learn and do something new every day. I live unstuck.

I ask: How about you? Do you have Dreams as yet Unrealized? They could be as Small as a Daily Exercise Routine or as large as Moving into an Uncharted Territory. I say: You’ll never know until you Try. Think of all the Books, half-written in the drawer. Or never Submitted. Do you have a Skill as yet Undiscovered? Do it. Banish Resistance and live unstuck. #unstuckliving#resistance

Doing is the quantum leap from imagining.

—Barbara Sher

The Path I Created

Duff photoDuff here. There is a wonderful Meadow next to where I live and I love to adventure there. Trees and shrubs, cactus and tiny flowers fill the expanse. And the scents! I stick my nose in paw prints left by other Big Dogs on the path. Then there’s the markings left by other Critters, some of which I ponder for quite a few moments. I could go forever in search of Exciting Experiences. I live unstuck.

There are Times when I elect to strike out and venture off the well-worn Path. I have a yen to check other Scents or Horizons (or even Trash). All is well and good until mom gets caught in branches and limbs. And that can be comical, indeed. You see, I am about twelve inches total in height. I can travel in the Smallest of Places. And worm my way into Impossible Thickets (according to my mom). You should see mom untangle my leash from the mess I have created. You would laugh. And I often do with my Doggy Smile. For you see, mom is 5’3” tall and does not have the advantage of being as compact as I am. But in spite of that challenge, she lives unstuck.

How about you? Are you staying on the Same Path you created many years ago? Or do you venture into New Experiences and leave a Trail? Expand your Horizons? Stretch your Imagination? I say: You got this. Your past experiences will serve you well. I have found that to be the case. And I think you will too. Live unstuck. #unstuckliving#adventuring

Do not go where the path may lead.

Go instead to where there is no path and leave a trail.

—Ralph Waldo Emerson


Unexpected Delightful Moments

Sometimes the best moments are the ones you didn’t plan at all,

—The Psychmind.com

Duff photoDuff again. I don’t know about you, but I have had many Good Moments in my life. And the unplanned ones are often the Best. The other day, I thought mom and I were gearing up for work. She was moving around, putting items into The Big Bag she carries to the office. Such interesting gear goes in there! Her thermos filled with tea. Her brown bag lunch. And a Snack for Me. Along with papers and such. I thought for sure we would head out the door any minute.

But it was a false alarm. Mom turned to her Computer and began to write (about Me and My Adventures). What an unexpected, delightful occasion. I relaxed and enjoyed this Best Moment, for I had fully intended to romp down the stairs with her and head toward the day’s undertaking. But to have a little time to Stretch out on the Sofa in the Sun? Now that’s a Best Moment indeed. I lived unstuck.

Have you made plans, only to have them change at the Last Moment? Do you enjoy the New Adventure? Or do you fuss over Lost Bones, so to speak? I say: Enjoy every minute. Life quickly speeds by. If you don’t catch its tailwind, you’ll miss out. And I don’t want that. Nor do you. Live unstuck. #unstuckliving#unexpecteddelightfulmoments

Adventuring About

Duff here. Have you ever had a yen to adventure? To explore something totally unknown to you? Well, I often do. There’s a hill alongside the place where I live with my mom. As you see from the pictures, I go way up on top, then tuck away into the nicest hidey hole of a nook in the mesquite you have ever seen.

And I have a mind of my own when adventuring. I come back when I want. My mom got excited (you might even say anxious) the first few times I went there, for I simply disappeared. She couldn’t see me. What a giggle.

But when she came after me and stepped into my secret place, she could sense the peace I experienced. And she understood why I liked to travel up there to explore. (Well that and to “claim my territory” from the other dogs who dared to venture into my realm. Can you imagine?)

Do you have a bucket list? How long is it? How many of your dreams have you completed so far? The Duff Advice is: start adventuring. Explore and fulfill your wishes. It’s never too late. Live unstuck. #UnstuckLiving

If you don’t risk anything, you risk even more.

—Erica Jong


Stars. We in the White Mountains are gifted with clear skies and bright stars. I step out for my morning walk and am dazzled by all the stars I can see. Some are large with a steady light. Others are much smaller and seem to twinkle. Some are grouped in bunches, leaving a vast area of darkness between them and others. Still others have a color, or perhaps I’m seeing a planet. I know if I looked through a telescope into the sky, I would see far, far out into the galaxy, with nebula creating other formations. And as in the course of nature, some are even extinguishing themselves.

As the sunrise comes each day, the stars seem to disappear. The Morning Star, in its glory, is the last to remain. These glittering points of light are not visible to the naked eye with sunlight around, but are still there. When clouds are overhead, the stars are blocked from sight. But they are still there. During a new moon, the stars are brilliant. I can easily see them, with the shape of the Big Dipper sharp and clear. The Milky Way arches across the sky, creating a path for the imagination. During the recent full moon with its intense light, these sparkling delights were barely visible. And yet they still exist.

Just as the stars as always there, you have a treasure chest of resources within yourself. Some of these gems sparkle and shine, for you have used them for a long time. Others are waiting to be discovered or polished. Just as the stars are constant, your skills, talents, and abilities are always there. You might not be aware of them, but they are waiting for you to discover them.

The bigger stars are more prominent. Similar to skills you have developed over the years, they shine their light. Like to fish and have done that for a long time? Your “fishing star,” with knowledge of tension in the line and muscle memory as to how you pull the fish in, is fairly bright. Quilted for years and are honing your skills? Your “quilting star,” with an eye for exact lines and perfect cutting techniques, will be dazzling.

Some stars are much, much smaller. These ideas need to be nurtured inside before they can be put out to shine. How about traveling? The concept starts as a tiny seed (“I think it would be fun to head over to Durango and ride the train”) then expands your world with new adventures. That star may grow brighter as the next trip is overseas. But that first dream starts out small.

Some of these stars would include developing personal traits. Courage, inner strength, future planning or even a sense of humor would fit here. These small stars can be cultivated to someday burst into a swirling nebula of opportunities and values. Getting along in years and realize you need to know more about the computer to further your game plan? You may tap into courage and grit and begin to learn. Did life change dramatically with a death or divorce? Time to discover and polish up the stars for inner strength. Perhaps even a sense of humor.

This treasure chest within is always available to you. Your challenge should you choose to accept it is to discover the stars inside you— the skills, talents and abilities—and make them shine. Your life, your body, and your mind will thank you. For after all . . . is it possible that stars are like a handful of diamonds randomly tossed across the sky? Who knows what you will find?

Bringing over 30 years of experience to her practice, Joan is a highly qualified NLP practitioner and hypnotherapist. She specializes in anxiety, panic attacks, fears, and phobias, using her knowledge to help her clients become no-limit people. Many have found her friendly ways and precise techniques to be the easiest road toward a better life.